Friday, October 21, 2011
Oh bother
Thursday, October 20, 2011
A typical day
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Oh yes I am really doing this. This is a true story.
My finger slowly reached up and pressed the "1 minute" button and the low whir of death began. I walked away not wanting to witness the horror as it drew it's last breath and died on the glass spinning plate (Maybe he would think he was in the 60's on a rotating circular bed as he went on to meet his maker?). Waiting for the beeping to signal that the deed was done and was time to remove the remains seemed like an eternity.
Finally with relief in the air it sounded like a trumpet. I was about to open the door and noticed a small black flicker out of the corner of my eye inside. What?!! To my surprise the little gnat was flying around happily. How could this be? In this very machine I have at one time made an arc of electricity happen trying to cook carrots and the gnat lives?! Oh it is on! All my feelings about performing an act of cruelty went out the window. "Does 2 minutes sound good to you....Harvey?" (I named him Harvey) Alright tough guy! 2 minutes doesn't seem to bother you?! Try 5!
After 5 minutes in the nuclear oven I peaked in to see if he had finally expired. After seeing no movement or body I opened the door slowly. I looked around and lifted the plate and found nothing. Nothing?! After staring at the back of the microwave trying to pick up on any movement it happened!! He flew right into my eye!
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Farmer McDonald has his hands full
This is what happened yesterday while Claire was at school and Sam was napping.
Ben: Old McDonald has a farm
E-I-E-I-OOOOO!
And on that farm he had a........Moose!
E-I-E-I-OOOOO!
With a moose moose here
And a moose moo.......Wait!.........Moose don't make noise.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Fare Fair Faire

I have been so busy with the bazaar this year that I haven't posted in a while. I am afraid that this is just going to be the case for another few weeks. I did manage to catch a mistake about the bazaar recently that no one else has. I guess they may have but no one has brought it to my attention. I have been spelling Fare wrong. We wanted a bit of a play on words for the bazaar and so we named it the Holiday Fare. We liked that since it was like Fair but Fare. I have just realized that I have been combining the words to spell Faire.
I now know this because I made a rather large order of printed signs to Vistaprint with the wrong spelling. It is misspelled on the church sign, website, fliers, and now all the signs to direct traffic where to go. Once I had my "Oh S#@% !" moment and clued Travis in as to what I had done, he thought it was just best to embrace the screw up and say that we invented a new word. I have to say that I am on board with this decision (Since I am committed now) and that if you talk to me openly in public about this I will deny that there was ever a problem in the first place. This was the plan from the beginning.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
My Monster
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Random sentances
I am sitting here in bed thinking of all the things I need to get done this week. House looks like a bomb went off but it needs to be cleaned up before Thursday night because there is going to be a meeting here. Meeting...Bazaar meeting. Not a BAZAAR meeting but a meeting about the bazaar I am in charge of. I have a thousand things I need to get done for my booth in the bazaar and I have no time to do them.
Travis is laying next to me breathing loudly and I kind of want to hit him with a pillow. That would not be so nice but it would feel good. I have had a headache for a couple of days now which is weird for me as I haven't had a headache for a while. I don't like it and my head itches. I keep wanting to do amazing things with my blog but I am having trouble managing my time. I am tired and have no energy and all I want to do is lay in bed all day. My kids have been a mix of good and evil lately. I don't know what to think about that other than they are kids. Maybe they are trying to kill me.
I have killed every Venus fly trap I have ever had. I clearly don't have enough flying bugs in my house to keep them fed. Travis has now decided to read my blog over my shoulder and it is maddening. Maybe I should hit him with a pillow. He did flick me for thinking about hitting him with a pillow once he read it. It would just be revenge.
My head is filled with random thoughts and it feels kind of good to let it out. What other crazy stuff is in there? I like cake. I really liked talking to Sam today like I was hosting a cooking show and had a thick Columbian accent. I don't know why it was Columbian but alas it was and Sam thought it was hilarious. That is the only accent that makes him laugh. I like to read to the kids with different accents but am afraid to do them for anyone else. I had a thought the other day to sue America for the loss of my accent. I love European accents and think they are interesting and classy and I want mine back. I am not happy that it was lost over time and I blame the melting pot that is America. Now as I write and narrate this in my head I am speaking in an Irish accent. Once it starts it can't be stopped. Oh well at least I am fancy in my own head. Ok now I sound like a head case. Off to bed before this turns into a 5 page essay on the crazy firings of my brain.





